June 28, 2005
Visit with the ASCJ's!
Ahhh what can I say about this weekend? A LOT actually! hehehe. I'll make a good update later but I had a great, peaceful and fun time! For those wondering what the heck is going on, I was on retreat with the Apostles of the Sacred Heart of Jesus this weekend. Basically, I fell in love. I was so resistant to it, but God is a God of surprise and boy did He pull a doozie on me! I didn't want to love them, I just wanted to cross them off the list so I could enter Nashville happily. I had on of those big revelation moments after confession and I realized that I was focusing on the "little things" like home visits and habit patterns and not on my heart. The priest who was doing confessions said a very wise thing to me. He said "you can't be a lawyer and add all these little contracts and requirements on to religious life. You just have to hand God a blank sheet of paper." It was just what I needed to hear just then! I had been so caught up in everything and that just made such sense. Now I'm no longer worried that my Mother Superior will send me to teach 3rd grade or something. I'll accept it because that's what one of my vows is; obedience.
I love the community because they are in the world, but not a part of it. They're a little more liberal about using technology than the Nashville Dominicans, but have all of the orthodoxy of prayer and love of the Church. For example, the Sisters are allowed to use email, but only a certain times, I think you can email friends once a month. Like I said, I didn't want to love them, also because they don't have as many young sisters as the Nashville Sisters. But I learned that that doesn't matter. God calls you where He needs and wants you.
Now I'm not saying that I'm definitely going to enter the Apostles, but they a really great. I'm going to look at a few more orders before I make a decision and I have to finish college (1 more year!).So pray for me, and I'll be praying for all of you!
I love the community because they are in the world, but not a part of it. They're a little more liberal about using technology than the Nashville Dominicans, but have all of the orthodoxy of prayer and love of the Church. For example, the Sisters are allowed to use email, but only a certain times, I think you can email friends once a month. Like I said, I didn't want to love them, also because they don't have as many young sisters as the Nashville Sisters. But I learned that that doesn't matter. God calls you where He needs and wants you.
Now I'm not saying that I'm definitely going to enter the Apostles, but they a really great. I'm going to look at a few more orders before I make a decision and I have to finish college (1 more year!).So pray for me, and I'll be praying for all of you!
// posted by Emily @ 5:01 PM 
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Hey Emily!!!! you know God Works in mysterious ways!!!!!!! I focused on one community during my discernment and I realized thats not the community for me and i focused more on my feelings and the sigs that the Saints were sending me!!!!! If God truly wants you to enter inot the Dominicans, then it will be, but let your feelings and the signs take its place. After your first visit to a community, wait a year until you go back again. The feelings may or may not change, time will only tell!!!!!! but if the feelings remain the same then its meant to be!!!!!!
For example, i wen tot visit a franciscan community over a year ago, i felt the same way you are feeling now, i was really happy, I felt peaceful and things seemed different, I was too hoeing to cross them off of my list, but i didnt!!!!!! A year later i went back to visit them again, and the feelings werent there!!!! i am still abit confused but I asked to come back again, so I havent had a a chance to go back and I will soon!!!!!! So just take your time and dont rush into things!!!!
For example, i wen tot visit a franciscan community over a year ago, i felt the same way you are feeling now, i was really happy, I felt peaceful and things seemed different, I was too hoeing to cross them off of my list, but i didnt!!!!!! A year later i went back to visit them again, and the feelings werent there!!!! i am still abit confused but I asked to come back again, so I havent had a a chance to go back and I will soon!!!!!! So just take your time and dont rush into things!!!!
Thank you! Y'know sometimes it takes someone else telling you for it to really sink in. I REALLY want to be in a community already, but I have to take my time and just see how things go.
I know how you feel, I desire to be in a community so badly that I feel if it is taking this long, its what God wants!!! he wants us to wait so we desire it more and more each day!!!!! But i figure it this way, if it takes me 2 years to enter, then so be it, its worth the waiting for the years!!!!!!!!!!!!
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